


goodnight moon

by touchingashton



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: 5 Seconds of Summer - Freeform, Death, F/M, Michael Clifford - Freeform, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-07
Updated: 2013-08-07
Packaged: 2017-12-22 16:56:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/915711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/touchingashton/pseuds/touchingashton
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He's that shy boy that admires her from afar and she is completely oblivious. He's finding it hard to keep holding on.</p>
            </blockquote>





	goodnight moon

He watches her with her friends and sighs at her beauty. He is sad that she doesn’t see what he sees. He sees a girl full of potential. He sees a girl with true beauty and a girl who knew the real meaning of love. In his eyes this girl was the definition of perfection.

It is times like these she truly appreciates; the times when she feels real happiness. A smile planted on her face and an adorable laugh that leaves her gasping for air emitting from her red lips. She is glad that she has friends to make her happy and that will always be there for her. She does not seem to notice the boy that is sitting at the back of the crowded classroom.

He writes about her every day. He writes about how much he loves her and how his heart yearns for her love in return. He writes about what it is exactly that he loves (he always ends up writing every little detail he can fit onto one page). Her laugh, her toothy grin, her full red lips, her dark, shiny brown hair, her kindness, her sparkling blue eyes. She really was a sight. She made him happy.

She often wonders why it is that she always feels a pair of eyes on the back of her head. Of course, she never turns around in her seat to see who it is because, well, that would be extremely awkward. She does, however, catch the person’s eye as he walks past her in a movement to leave the now almost empty classroom. It is the beautiful blonde boy with the beautiful blue eyes that sits behind her in English.

He leaves the class in a hurry after deciding to go another day without talking to her. Her name was on his lips the way home but not once did he speak it. It would feel too natural, it would make him smile, he would be happy. He didn’t deserve happiness. Not for all the wrongs he’s done. He walks in the opposite direction today. He is not going home, but some place new, some place to finally be at peace.

She looks at where he was once seated and sees a single notebook resting on the desk. She walks up to it and picks it up. The front read Michael Clifford – Journal. Is that the boy’s name? Michael truly is a beautiful name. She knows she should not read his innermost personal thoughts, but then again, he left it here and just walked away without it. She opens the first page and read the words.

'Today I was going to tell her I love her. I was too afraid.'

She moves to the second page.

'I am beginning to believe that we shall never be, but I cannot move on. She is the only thing keeping me tied to this world. She is the only person making me happy. '

She wants to know who this mystery girl is. She reads onto the middle of the book.

'Kristin. Krissy. The beautiful girl I sit behind in English and two rows behind in History. I am in love with this girl. She is beautiful.'

She cannot help the gasp that escaped her lips. She reads on.

/The way she smiles, the way she laughs. It is neither in her face nor her body. It is neither in her smile nor her laugh. It is not her sparkling blue eyes that hold so much emotion that leave me wanting more. It is her in itself. She is wonderful. She brings me joy. She is kind to all and she is hilarious. I sit and I watch, hoping that one day she will notice me. Hoping that maybe, just maybe, I can someday be her perfect partner and she will love me as I love her.'

Krissy cries alone in the empty classroom at the thought of the heartbreak the beautiful boy with the beautiful hair and the beautiful eyes must feel. She has never seen him smile. He always seems to have his head down. She reads the last page.

'I am no longer able to hold on. She does not love me as I love her nor will she ever. Mum and Dad have left and I am alone. I am hanging by a thread and it is getting harder to continue living. I am no longer able to laugh, no longer able to cry, no longer able to meet her eyes. This is goodbye.'

She drops the journal and runs. She is not certain of where, exactly, but her feet are taking her somewhere and she is not willing to object. She can hear her friends call her name and hear the teacher’s shouts for her to return to the school grounds but she cannot and will not allow Michael to end his life. She will save this boy if it is the last thing she does.

He quietly says his goodbyes and they echo throughout the empty room. He has found himself at an abandoned building where he is sure to be found – people are coming to destroy it tomorrow. “To Krissy, the girl who has not once seen my love for her or noticed the way I look at her, I hope you find happiness,” he voices his final farewell and steps onto the brown stool. He is not afraid of the afterlife but of what would become of him. He puts his head into the loop of the rope and steps forward.

She runs and runs until her brain thinks of a place someone could be alone but also be found. The old indoor playground. She runs inside, breathless, and shouts, “Michael?!” Worry is evident in her voice. She runs frantically around the place until she reaches the monkey bars. She is too late.


End file.
